Dear Mr. Trump / Mr. US President, 
We heard about your failed attempt to buy Greenland.
(Some people are so unreasonable) 
However Fear Not!
Canada is wide open!
Most everything in Canada is already owned by outside Countries. 
(No other Country in the World would permit this, but we're pretty easy) 
SO! Help yourself!
Below I've listed some deals you might be interested in. 
BUT you better hurry!!!! 
Because somebody else will probably snap them up
while you're procrastinating.
Here you go!: 

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